An old man turned ninety-eight He won the lottery
and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids good-bye He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought 'Well isn't this nice...'
It's a traffic jam when you're already late
It's a no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons
when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic... don't you think?
NO. I DO NOT. IT'S NOT IRONIC, IT JUST SUCKS. ARE WE CLEAR NOW?